Depersonalize the Process

In life as in art, our point of view is our primary lens. We may seek objectivity, but we can’t always (can’t hardly ever) escape the limits of our vision.

The myopia can impede our progress in very personal ways. In this post, I discuss the problem of personalization and offer suggestions for finding the space to expand our vision.

Writing a book requires us to externalize our interiority. It’s hard work, and it provokes some epic, though predictable, struggles. There’s the painful friction between our ambition and our ability, for instance, and the grating irritation when our imagined product rubs up against our practical progress.

For writers who can’t not write, surrender is not an option. We must cope. Sometimes (or often), we do so by personalizing our challenges: I’m not smart enough or good enough to say what I want to say; I don’t know enough to have an opinion; I’m not qualified to have an opinion; or, Readers don’t get what I’m going for; People aren’t ready for my insights.

In other words, we personalize the difficulties that are typical of the process. And as a result, we remain locked inside our interiority and blocked.

If you can’t see beyond your struggle, you need some space. Get it by depersonalizing the process. First, ground yourself: Notice the struggle that you feel. Let yourself feel it. Then, remind yourself that this is just the uncanny byproduct of the work. There’s no solution, not for you, not for anyone else.

Next, identify a handful of very simple, relevant tasks that you want to and can easily complete. You might reformat a section. Or you might create a personality questionnaire for a character. Or you might tell a friend which three sources you’re going to summarize over the next few days.

These are simple interventions, and that’s the point. They offer a gentle way to make some space, thereby creating the distance necessary to depersonalize the struggle and engage in the process just a bit more comfortably.